Germans don't know how to answer the question "How are you?"
In English, I mean. If they've learned English for a while, they've likely had drilled into their heads that "How are you?" is just something we say to be polite, it is not an invitation to launch into a litany of your woes, and the correct answer is always "Fine, thanks."
"What if I'm really ill?" they ask me. "What if I'm actually not fine? Do I have to lie?" I generally tell them that, no, honesty is okay, but yes, the expectation is that you keep your answer more or less neutral.
Incidentally, someone recently made the valid point that it's a bit silly for Germans to complain about how we do or don't answer "How are you?" because in German often they don't even ask each other a proper question at all, but (especially young people, among friends) simply greet each other with the nonsense particle "Na?" To which the only real response is another "Na?"
Since it sounds goofy to answer "Na?" with "Na?" this can easily turn into a race to see who can say "Na?" first, leaving the other to lamely echo, "Na?"
And don't even get me started on the British, whose "How do you do" is not, as you might think, a question, but rather a phrase of greeting, and is properly – and only – answered with another "How do you do."
Huh. Maybe because I take things literally in general, I do consider "How are you?" an actual question. When I ask it, I am often actually asking how the person is doing. Answering it often takes me a second because I am thinking of how to sum up how I actually am. (Like this comic: http://xkcd.com/222/ ) Although the involvedness/honestness of my answer depends on whether someone is asking me in a conversation, or just walking by in the hall.
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right, I was certainly generalizing. But I think that's more what I mean (and what I tried to explain to the student who asked about this recently) – that the levels of detail and honesty vary with who you're talking to.
ReplyDeleteAlso, on the comic: ha :)